Wednesday, August 16, 2006

Urgh

I'm so overwhelmed today. It's just been one of those days. Lots of people have called and visited today and I've spent a lot of time talking about my mom. I love my mom and I love talking about her but repeating all the same news over and over is exhausting. I don't know how to answer people now when they ask how she is.

If I say not good I sound pessimistic. If I say it was a good day it sounds too optimistic. If I say she is hanging in there it's like she is hovering close to heaven. What in the heck do I say????? She has pancreatic cancer, how good do you think she is?

This whole thing is just so odd. Today she got a wheelchair. To many places don't have them and we just needed one for her so she can actually go out when she wants. So hospice brings the wheelchair and they show us how to use it. The Donna and I try to get the thing in the car. What an ordeal! That wheelchair has more levers and knobs and we didn't know what we were doing. So much for the lesson. When the hospice lady did it it looked way easy! We finally got it figured out and loaded and it worked today so mom could go to the mall. But it made me think of all the things we have learned in the past 6 months. Who would have ever thought a year ago we would be doing the things we are doing. I've learned more in 6 months about medical things, financial things, remodeling, and life in general than I feel like I have my whole life prior. CRAZY! No wonder my head hurts so much!!!

Me

2 comments:

Julie said...

My head hurts for you! Can't they just make a wheelchair that unfolds automatically at the push of a button? Like those automatic air beds that inflate themselves? That'd be cool.

Molecular Turtle said...

You should just say what you feel or perhaps say that you feel uncomfortable talking about. It must be really tough saying the same depressing news over and over